People always say, past is past. We need to move on to see the future. BUT!, how can I move on when our past is the only thing we ever wanted in the future???? I don’t have any strength to stay with this situation anymore. Arghhhh stresss paham tak. I was too young and I should be travelling the world and enjoying myself. I just wanted ….. mmm ohhh I don’t know what I wanted. I was confent to be miserable. I don’t want all the attention directed at me, the instrusive question about how I was feeling and what I was going to do. I feel stupid even crying about that! You’ve been so good to me and I’ve been such a horrible, horrible bitch of daughter. I don’t know what I’d do without you. You’re right. Losing someone you love is always hard, no matter if they’re alive or not. Hum I’ll always be beside you until the very end, wiping your tears away, being your best daughter. I’ll smile when you smile and feel all the pain you do, and if you cry a single tear, I promise I’ll cry too.
Allah jua penentu segalanya, namun aku masih disini mencari, masih tak pasti… hidup ini indah jika segalanya kerana Allah.
I feel a lot better already. So far, today was going well.
